What would happen if we all just waited for the perfect job to fall into our laps? Most of us would retire with a pretty mediocre job. The same example can be used when looking for a partner. If you simply sit back and wait for Mr. or Mrs. Right to show up at your doorstep, you may be single for longer than you think.
If you’ve been thinking about taking the next big step, be it in your career or love life, it’s time to take matters into your own hands and start making things happen. What’s interesting is that the search for your dream job and dream girl (or guy) are not as different as you might think and there are a number of techniques that are used to advance a career which can also be applied to your search for love.
Keep an up to date resume
The comparison: Keep an up to date online dating profile
An employer has to go by what’s written on your resume before you have the opportunity to let your personality shine in an interview. That is one important sheet of paper! Treat your online dating profile with the same importance you do your job resume, it should be current and reflect your most recent experiences.
Since people respond better to content that is fresh and new, try sharing your latest travel or other notable experience in the start of your profile and update it every so often. These small changes and attention to detail can ignite a big difference and will encourage more people to contact you.
Finally, it goes without saying that your featured photo should be a recent one, no more than a few months old.
Bonus tip: Get creative with your photos by choosing a few that offer a little peek into your life. Online dating is ubiquitous and you need to find a way to stand out.
Improve your professional skill set
The comparison: Work on being the type of person you want to meet
When looking for your dream job, you need to meet the requirements to fill the position you are interested in which often means having to brush up on your skills or acquire a new skill set altogether. Similarly, in your dating life, you need to make sure that you yourself live up to the same standards as what you are looking for in a partner. For example, if you want to meet someone successful, cultured, and in good shape, you can rest assure that person is looking for the same thing.
Use the time you have now to work on yourself. Take piano lessons, explore new cities, learn a new language, get in shape. Being able to offer the best version of yourself to someone else will bring confidence in knowing you deserve the same in return.
Attend job fairs and networking events
The comparison: Accept all personal invitations that come your way
Making new connections will increase your chances of landing a great job and can open doors that lead to positions even better than you had initially sought out for. The same is true in your dating life. Start accepting invites to parties, go to singles events and be open to blind dates. It’s easy to make excuses after a long day’s work so you’ll have to consciously make this a priority in your life. Become a yes-person and tell people that is who you are! The more you say yes, the more opportunity you create.
Be open to a change of industry
The comparison: Be open to dating different types of people
After having worked in the same space for a long time, you get so comfortable and may find you are no longer moving forward. This is classified as a job rut and you’ve surely heard the same in the world of dating. However, falling into a dating rut can be the result of always going after the same type of person and, like anything else that hasn’t worked time and time again, change is due. You need to be open to giving people a chance that are typically not your “type”.
Breaking such a pattern will take effort and to get started you can give the following exercise a try.
Write down the reasons why your past relationships haven’t worked out and list commonalities among your ex-partners. Consider physical appearance, character traits, lifestyle and professional achievements. Being aware of what to look for or avoid is the first step.
The comparison: Get comfortable with dating
You’ve heard the classic story about the wide-eyed, hopeful student with a shiny new degree whom no one will hire. Why? Because he doesn’t have any job experience. The same may be true in your single life. You can look the part, you can sound great on paper, and your friends tell you you’re the best catch ever, but the few dates that you go on never result in anything more.
Don’t assume you don’t need to practice dating. Perfect small talk and flirting aren’t innate skills, but the good news is that you can get better at it. Start to accept or set dates up with more people than just those who have the potential to be “the one”. And the next time you find yourself sitting across from someone you instinctively know isn’t for you, practice your approach rather than silently planning your escape route. Try experimenting with unique questions or what you would normally share about yourself and assess what type of response you get.
Featured photo credit: www.firebrandtalent.com